Dealing with Narcissistic Mother
Posted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:41 pm
I would like to get some advice. My mother most likely has NPD, based on what I have read about it. She is so self-absorbed and will lie, cheat and steal from her own kids to make sure she gets what she wants. She has no regard for anyone but herself.
She has emotionally and physically abused me since childhood...and it still goes on. She is 65 years old, having to live with my sister (whom she favored considerably when we were growing up) because she is so financially irresponsible and can't hold a job for more than a few weeks. My sister owns her own home, is single, and has a good-paying job. She only has herself to worry about. On the other hand, my husband and I (who are still trying to recover from a layoff and huge cut in pay when he did find work) have two children that we are trying to take care of. I feel like my first responsibility is to my own children, not to some adult who will not grow up and take responsibility for herself. She expects all of us to take care of everything for her, and tells other people what bad daughters we are because we don't totally support her. She is 65 (but this has been going on for years), not disabled, and in good health...she just doesn't feel like working and taking care of herself.
My question is: should I feel obligated to help support her when I have my own children to worry about?
She has emotionally and physically abused me since childhood...and it still goes on. She is 65 years old, having to live with my sister (whom she favored considerably when we were growing up) because she is so financially irresponsible and can't hold a job for more than a few weeks. My sister owns her own home, is single, and has a good-paying job. She only has herself to worry about. On the other hand, my husband and I (who are still trying to recover from a layoff and huge cut in pay when he did find work) have two children that we are trying to take care of. I feel like my first responsibility is to my own children, not to some adult who will not grow up and take responsibility for herself. She expects all of us to take care of everything for her, and tells other people what bad daughters we are because we don't totally support her. She is 65 (but this has been going on for years), not disabled, and in good health...she just doesn't feel like working and taking care of herself.
My question is: should I feel obligated to help support her when I have my own children to worry about?