Havign a parent with BPD

[Beth McHugh]

The effects of having a parent with borderline personality disorder can be confusing and painful, particularly as it can take decades to work out that your parent actually suffers from a mental illness. The link below gives one examples - other articles on the main forum on BPD provide insights into living with a parent with this condition.

http://youronlinecounselor.com/Articles ... fferer.htm

Best wishes,

Beth

[Ann_Owens]

Several years ago, a counselor mentioned to me that I might have a condition called Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I had never heard of this disorder and checked out a book at the library "Understanding the borderline mother : helping her children transcend the intense, unpredictable, and volatile relationship" by Christine Ann Lawson. The book was thorough and informative. In retrospect, I saw several personality traits of BPD in my own behavior and was able to "confirm" this diagnosis through ongoing treatment and through classes in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. It is helpful to remember that not everyone displays all of the signs/symptoms of any one disorder. For example, I was never a cutter, never consciously harmed myself. However, my behavior was sometimes risky (multiple sexual partners, driving drunk etc.).

I am what they refer to as someone with a "Dual Diagnosis": Substance Abuser and Mental Illness. My drug of choice was alcohol. Once I became aware that my "conditions" had names (alcoholism, depression, DBT), I was able to seek the treatment, find many local resources (many free) and DO THE WORK required! Note:12 step programs do work for those willing to make the necessary changes and to STOP the behavior and to WORK the program. I highly recommend seeking the assistance of professionals and doing the research for resources that will help you through your recovery. You CAN do it. You have to WANT to do it. Make no mistake, CHANGE is DIFFICULT! Remember this: Nothing changes if Nothing Changes.

[Cowell]

Having a parent with BPD is indeed a nightmare and a big challenge for the relationship. Very interesting read, Beth.

[Sadie]

Having a parent with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) can indeed be confusing and painful, often taking years to understand their behavior is due to a mental illness. The linked article offers valuable examples, and exploring other articles on the main forum can provide deeper insights into navigating life with a parent who has BPD.