Your Online Counselor Forum

Forgiveness is a topic that has been on my mind over the last several months. It will soon be 2 years since I last saw/spoke to my NM, notwithstanding the surprise pop in visit from both her and her NM a few months ago as if nothing was wrong...incidentally I did not let them in and instead exchange...

Hi Beth. Just wondering if a pseudo N can be "fixed" or "cured" unlike a real true N? If they are exhibiting the exact same behaviors as their N partner, does that mean that on the inside they also think they are perfect and the world around them is wrong? Do they have typically ...

Hi, Onlywantlove. I am sorry that you are dealing with this, too, and that you are living so close to your NM! At least I can live in relative peace that on most days, my NM isn't just going to pop in. I am disappointed in myself for not being prepared for the ambush because it is Fall and they make...

Cheech, thanks very much for posting your experience. I wonder about this topic from time to time. My husband has asked me whether I would attend either my NM's or her NM's funeral. Since I will probably be the one arranging my NM's I would assume that I would attend. How I will deal with all of her...

So, I get a call yesterday morning from my brother...I was in the midst of a toddler tantrum and trying to get to a poopy diaper so that particular moment in my day was already a bit chaotic. The words out of my brother's mouth far surpassed anything I could have imagined in my worst nightmares...&q...

Thanks, Beth. Wow, that's an interesting statement about dolls, because that is what I have always felt like in the presence of my N grandmother...not really a person, but a limp, lifeless doll, an object. As a child, I was supposed to look cute and perfect and my purpose was solely for her entertai...

Hi, Grizelda! It's been a while! I think you are fortunate that you had the ability to put your NM in to a home. That is where part of the guilt comes into play for me w/ the NC. I hear through my brother and SIL about my NM's deteriorating health (and I also hear how her NM says it is all my fault,...

I really admire you for stepping up to care for your aging parents in such a way! I would defintiely do the same if my dad were still living, as we were very close. However, now that he is gone, and it is just my NM, I've had such a rude awakening to how she really is w/out him around acting as a bu...

Veejmar - so sorry you are dealing with this! One thing I have noticed, particularly in my own situation and with respect to my brother, is that it seems a different beast for the male children. For my brother, I think it is because there is perceivalby more shame placed on a male who isn't caring f...

The thing that seems consistent w/ NM's is drama, isn't it? Wow! What a story! So sorry you are going through this w/ your NM, but it does sound like you have the support you need from your hubby. Sounds like NC is wise in your case...but it sounds like maybe you have actually been in contact online...